The Art of Deadma: Boss Edition

I can’t believe I’m talking about this because I am the last person I can think of that would “deadma” something especially if it would trigger so many feelings.

With everything that happened to me, I have learned how to control my emotions, to choose my battles, to know how I should react especially in stressful scenarios. It wasn’t easy but the moment I was able to get the hang of it, then all is well. Hence I have learned the art of deadma.

After the holidays, my boss gave everyone in our team his Christmas gift. Everyone had their gifts on top of their tables except me. Yup! You got that right, he didn’t bother giving me a gift. He left me out.

Had it happened a year ago, I would’ve bawled my eyes out. It would have hurt me so bad that I would overthink every single detail. I would make assumptions as to why he would have left me out! But now, I don’t care as much as I always did.

Whether his intentions would be to hurt me, to make me feel bothered or not, I don’t care. I wouldn’t give him the slightest satisfaction of seeing me hurt or affected and the good part is I am not even pretending to be unaffected!

Because last night, I was just thanking God for all the blessings he gave me. He answered my prayers especially when I asked him to grant me healing. I feel so blessed just by thinking about my family, friends and loved ones and that is enough to make me feel happy. I don’t need  gifts in fancy wrapping papers, I don’t need fake love. I got what I need and that’s enough.

So the art of deadma works well especially when you feel satisfied, happy and blessed beyond belief. Whoo!

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Life Lately

For a while I have succumbed to my depressive tendencies but since I am out of my shell again, I will fascinate you with my enthusiastic writing spirit.

  • I have updated my Everyday Reads and I am happy that my list is growing! Personally, I’d love for all the members of TFIOB to be on my list but I can’t seem to put everyone’s link all at the same time. Jusme. Please please help me, please leave me your links on the comments below (ang artista ko dito chos) so I can add you. The ones I have added already are the ones I’m close with our the first ones who exposed me to the Filipino blogging community but it doesn’t mean that I will have it exclusively only for those I like because at this point of my life, I like everyone in TFIOB and I don’t mind reading your blogs on a daily basis! So please, help me. Comment your links and I will gladly put your link on my blog! ❤
  • Hmm what else? Oh yeah, I am actually comfortable with my “strict” diet, I love my skincare products and right now as of the 3rd of November around quarter to 6 in the evening, I am feeling happy and okay. Whoohoo!
  • Also, Amielle, Ica, Krishel and I have discussed the Japanese movie entitled “Tomorrow I Will Date Yesterday’s You”.  (It was because Amielle went crazy and she asked us what we know but of course I didn’t know the movie so I watched it. Ayan, naulol din ako.)
    The movie is SOMETHING. I swear. I didn’t pay much attention to it but towards the end, I’m going crazy without even knowing it. HAYY! You guys should also watch it. NKKLK. (I also told Jolens and Amielle told everyone in TFIOB to watch it hahahahah kaloka) I don’t know if this is a good movie but it’s something. hahaha!
  • After the holiday (October 31 and November 1) I didn’t like the idea of going back to work but miraculously, I was able to finish everything I needed to finish and I am even working in advanced to avoid backlogs! Hah!
  • What else? Oh during the Halloween, I read the first 3 books of Harry Potter again and when I was done, Kyx and I watched the movies! Kyx was not a fan but I think he turned into a Potterhead after 3 movies hahaha. I forgot how much feels and love I have for these books! NKKLK.
  • Also, I forgot to publish my #KyxAila serye!! I’m so sorry!!! Hahahahaha I will schedule the posts tomorrow hihi.

I have something to write about and I am excited to write it all. My mind is racing and I need to chill! I’ll probably write tomorrow.

XOX, Tee

 

Si Kyxa at Si Aila S01E03: Binuhay Ang Kilig

Bago mag graduation, ibinalik sa akin ng kaibigan ko yung book bind, tapos na daw silang lahat magsulat. Kinakabahan ako kasi alam kong nakapagsulat na si Kyx.

TLE Project

Pumunta kami ni Diane sa classroom namin, sa isang sulok, binuksan naming yung book bind at hinanap ang parte kung saan nagsulat si Kyx. Ang iksi lang, pero ang laki ng kahulugan sakin.

❤ ❤ ❤

Bumalik yung kilig ko tapos tumili nalang kami ni Diane.

Simula non, nagusap na ulit kami. Pero alam ko, huli na rin naman ang lahat. Magcocollege na kami, mag-iiba na ang landas naming dalawa. Sa Miriam ako, all girls nanaman at siya naman ay sa FEU.

Masayang malungkot. Pero sa isip isip ko, baka mas magkaroon ng chance na maging kami kapag college na kami!?

Gumraduate na nga kami, tapos hindi na kami nagkita buong bakasyon.

April 2008, inimbita ko siya sa birthday party ko sa Mcdonald’s. Children’s party yun pero puro high schoolers kami, 17th birthday party ko yun pero hindi siya pumunta.

Naisip ko nanaman hindi siguro ako importante kaya ganon. Nalungkot nanaman ako. Back to square 1 nanaman ulit. Wala nang katapusang paikot ikot, walang katapusang pakiramdaman.

Sa puntong ito, pakiramdam ko ako lang naman talaga ang may nararamdaman.

Inside Aila’s Life Day in Day Out

Why do I write so often? As in everyday, may posts ako siguro 1 to 3 posts a day? How do I do that? Kahit hindi naman ako sikat na blogger sadyang ang dami ko lang sinasabi lagi HAH!

Hi guys! Here are several reasons why I can write so many posts or how I can write daily (except on weekends)

  • I don’t have many friends I can talk to on a daily basis. So I end up writing everything that I could have told a real life person. (sad nu hahaha chos)
  • I think about a lot of random things and I want to share it with other people but I don’t have anyone aside from Kyx and my mama who would listen to all of those random thoughts so I end up writing it here on my blog hehe.
  • I work as an in-house copywriter. I write a whole lot of contents for newspaper, social media, magazine and all that. No one bothers me in the office, not so much. So when I get burned out, I’ll write something using MS Word and people still think I’m working on an article hahahaha ‘kala niyo ang dami kong time ‘no? HAHAHA! ßeto talaga yung reason kung bakit nakakapagsulat ako ng madalas sa blog eh. Sana hindi mabasa ng officemates ko. If mabasa niyo, guys ginagawa ko naman work ko eh. Sadyang need lang ng break daily diba? LELS. Hahaha
  • I am very very quiet in real life. Especially in the office. Backstory: it took me a good 6 months before I warmed up to my officemates. They are very friendly and warm, when I was new here, a lot of other people are also new (so hindi ka ma-OP talaga diba) but I am very distant. I don’t talk to them unless I need to or they need something from me, I don’t eat lunch with them, it’s either I wait for all of them to finish eating before I eat or I wait for Kyx’s lunch break (dati same building kami nung nag-ooffice pa si Kyx) Now, I talk to my officemates and I eat lunch with them. I’m also a bit talkative now but really, I’m a quiet and shy type of person MEHEHE. I only ever unleash my mind and soul here on my blog, dito nabubuhos.
  • I find it hard to speak. I am an awkward person and conversations in real life kinda make me cringe so as best as I could, I communicate with my office mates through chat or emails HAHAAH. So maybe, I write a lot cause this is the only space I have wherein I can talk wholeheartedly? And twitter!!

September 16 and 17

After the book signing, Kyx and I went to Ayen and Bella’s simple but fun 21st birthday celebration. I love spending time with these youngins cause I feel young too hahaha I’m their Ate and even if I am 5 years older, we still click together eh.

We stayed for about an hour then left for ramen at Makati with his friends.

This is my 2nd try at Mendokoro Ramenba. I didn’t like it the first time we went there but maybe because I ordered their tantanmen which is clearly not the best-seller (or ako lang nagdecide na hindi siya for best-seller?) Anyway, we were there around 9:30? Traffic from Pasig to Makati wasn’t that bad, it’s in fact very light and smooth. We picked Suwa up at Glorietta 4 and we went to Mendokoro Ramenba where we waited for Kenneth and King. We were in line for about an hour, there are a lot of people and we didn’t know it’s a big hit. I always thought of that restaurant as meh but then it changed! HAH! We ordered the Super Chashu, I didn’t order my own bowl cause I ate at Ayen and Bella’s birthday gig and I was still full so Kyx just gave me some of his and I LOVED IT GRABE ANO BA. Huhuhu. I always thought Ippudo was the best ramen place here in PH but I think I love Mendokoro Ramenba now!


After eating, we hung out for a bit with the boys and talked about life and all the fun stuff they have to share hahaha. Kyx’s friends are my friends too and it’s always nice to hang out with them.

Sunday, Kyx and I did nothing but cleaned our room, watched K-Movies and slept. I like slow and lazy Sundays more often than not. Nakapahinga ako ng maayos.

How was your weekend guys?
I was planning to go to the last day of the Manila International Book Fair 2017 at SMX Moa but decided not to. Aside from the fact that traffic would be so bad, there would be lots of people too and there’d be loads of books that I would buy even if it wasn’t part of my budget so I chose to sleep instead. Magagastos ko talaga yung buong sahod ko don kaya I didn’t trust myself hah!

Is There Something by Christopher Cross

When you guys, as a couple fight about small or petty things, how do you patch things up?

For us, if it’s only me—making a big deal out of him breathing too loudly or smiling in the wrong manner or just being pissed cause I can *rolling eyes*, Kyx pulls out his funny streak and I’d end up laughing. He has this unique antics prepared for when I turn into a monster or something. One of it is playing a “patama” song while I’m brooding over things that are not even brood-worthy.

Ganito yan…

One of his favourite songs to play when I’m acting up is a song by Christopher Cross called Is There Something.

When I’m mad, pissed, upset or irritated with him he’d blast this off and I would be all like “what the actual fuck?” then he’ll smile and laugh at me. I’d go laughing and I’d forget why I’m even mad in the first place.

Sobrang gago diba? Pinapatugtog niya yan kapag napipikon na ako sakanya eh di natatawa tuloy ako. WTF hahahaha. Here’s how the chorus goes:

“Is there something that you want to tell me

Is there something that I ought to know

Are we something that’s still worth fighting for

Or should I simply let you go

Is there something I can do to reach you

Are we something more than history

I’ll find some way to convince you to stay

If you just tell me honestly

Is there something left of you and me

Nagegets niyo ba ginagawa niya? Nakakatawa kasi eh. Nagdadrama. Bigla nalang niya ‘yang papatugtugin kapag nag-aattitude ako so siyempre natatawa nalang ako, nagbabati tuloy kami ng wala sa oras hehehehe. However, he only does this kapag alam niyang kaya niya. Minsan kasi, super monster ako tawag niya doon ay “auto-demon” kaya kapag auto-demon ako, hindi niya yan magagawa. Hahaha.

Listen to the song. It’s an old one hehehe. ❤

Hi, My Name Is..

I wrote about it a long time ago but I can’t seem to finish it. Let’s try and write it again.

I don’t know what was wrong with me but ever since I was young, ever since I started going to school, I choose what other people will call me. My name, aside from being an identity, I use it very religiously. As if it’s part of who I am and how I am as a person.

I am not sure if this is the correct explanation ‘cause I’d like to think it’s not, but my therapist said that it was because of my OCD that’s why I choose what name other people will call me. Let’s start from the beginning.

My name is Althea Camila put them together, you’ll get AILA. Aila is the nickname my mom gave me. Everyone from my family calls me “Aila” it’s pronounced as “ay-la” as in “Isla” (punyeta pano ba sabihin ang pronunciation ng pangalan ko?) Basta it’s not “ei-la” as in “ay-lah” ganern. HAHA.

When I started preschool, I have a busmate named Patrick. He lives near my home so he knows everyone calls me “Aila”. One fine day, he got so excited when he saw me at school and yelled my nickname for all the world to hear. By the way, in preschool, everyone calls me “Althea”. I was so agitated and told Patrick “stop calling me Aila! We’re at school!” he just shrugged and ignored me. When I got home, I told my mom that I was so upset because Patrick called me by my nickname at school when in fact, I’d like everyone at school to call me Althea (eyes rolling at this point nearly 21 years ago) my mom asked me why I am so upset when it wasn’t a big deal after all? I told her that I feel like the only people who can call me by my nickname is my family (and people I really love or people who are so close to me)

In grade school, I allowed people to call me “Thea” or my close and best friends would call me “Theii”. Nobody called me Aila because, well, I didn’t want them to. My best friends can call me Aila but they prefer Theii instead (as in double ‘I’ talaga di ko sure bakit)

When I transferred from SPCP to NJHS in high school, people called me Aila. It was a small community and I felt intimately close to them (not anymore ngayon whatever. Hahaha)

In college, I feel like I wouldn’t be befriending people so I didn’t allow them to call me Aila. Instead, they all call me “Aia”. Although now, they can call me Aila but they just prefer to call me Aia hah!

Now, I have decided that people I like can call me Aila or Thea, whatever they wish to call me. Only with my permission. My blogger friends from TFIOS calls me Aila or Thea and surprisingly, I don’t mind!

Kasi, after what I have been through 5 months ago, I decided that the only people I’d go all out with can call me by my nickname. I feel like it’s still sacred but I allow my blogging friends to call me that HAHA!

Now, you—whoever you are reading this. You can call me Aila or Thea and I wouldn’t mind. ❤

In a nutshell, masyado akong ewan ko ba. Pinipili ko kasi talaga sino lang yung pwede tumawag ng ganon sa akin. Kapag close na tayo ganon, pwede na. Ngayon naman kasi sa blogging world, feel ko ka-close ko kayong lahat so gowww lang haha. Dati kasi, depende sa tao. Kapag may tumawag sakin na Thea or Theii, alam ko nan a grade school friend or St. Paul friend yun. If Aia, alam kong college friend yun or from Miriam yung taong yun. If Aila, friend ko talaga or family or relative. Pag Althea, yan yung mga hindi masyadong close hahahahaha