Today I’m letting go. It’s been a year of saying and being sorry to this person who can’t forgive. To this individual who may have the ability to forgive but choose to fight hurt with hurt.
I was wondering why some people can hurt other people deliberately and not be sorry about it. I wonder how some people can wake up every morning and sleep soundly at night knowing that they have hurt someone. I wonder how some people can live day by day knowing that a person is trying to reach out not for friendship but for letting loose a grudge, pain and heartbreak.
(Or baka ako lang yung nagsasaalangalang sa ibang tao? I got so mad at this individual pero mas pinipili kong magpatawad at magsorry kung nakasakit man ako dahil una ayaw ko ng may mga kasamaan ng loob at pangalawa, mag-best friends ang tatay namin. Nilalagay ko yun sa unahan dahil ayokong malagay sa alanganin ang tatay ko.)
But then again we can’t control other people and how they react. We can’t force them to be soft hearted when they’re not. We can’t tell them to be this way, to act like this because for sure, there’s a reason as to why they are doing what they’re doing.
Kaya naman I am letting go of that person and the pain. I will not pretend that that person do not exist, I will just let it be. If I let go of the pain and hurt, I unburden myself of the baggage that I shouldn’t even be carrying in the first place. Let go of the people who hurt us, let go of the pain they brought and forgive them.
Easier said than done but this is definitely easy if you have a kind heart.
Because when you’re hurting someone and when feelings are involved, the bahala ka sa buhay mo attitude does not reflect kindness. It reflects kontrabida-ness teh.
Hindi pwedeng laging nagmamatigas para protektahan ang sarili. Hindi pwedeng laging galit agad ang pinapairal natin. Because at the end of the day, the person who holds the grudge will never be able to let go of the pain.
Ikaw, oo ikaw nga, kung iyan ang nagpapatulog ng mahimbing sayo, nakakapagpasaya sa buhay mo, yung nagpapagising ng may ngiti sa labi mo, then so be it. Pero tandaan mo, kung walang pagbabago, ibang tao ang laging magaadjust at masama pa rin talaga ugali mo, it’s on you. You will never be truly happy in life.
Of course, since I have to work from 9am to 4pm, I can’t make it on time. OBVS.
Right after work, I asked my officemate/friend, Anne if she can help me and my late sorry ass to go to Gateway Cubao. There was this “hidden” pathway called Butas and from there, we rode a tricycle heading to Guadalupe and then we rode the MRT going to Cubao. It was a fun experience because I don’t get to do that very often and I learned a lot from that trip (I’ll write about it some other time) Basta ang hirap huminga sa loob ng MRT, I swear haha.
When I arrived at Banapple, Gateway Mall (where the meet up was held) almost everyone was there. I didn’t get to talk to them as intimately as I’d liked to but it was still a fun experience. Those whom I met at the first meet up grew closer to my heart and the ones I’m meeting for the first time made me look forward to the next meet up.
There are still a lot of other Filipino bloggers from TFIOB that I’m looking forward to meet and talk to in person. Hopefully on the next meet up, I’d be able to see everyone.
On this meet up, I was able to meet these wonderful people and we all have different blogging styles, topics, culture, backgrounds and means of living but one thing that I realized is that everyone of us clicks just about right! We were able to set aside our differences and ang saya lang talaga hahah.
I’ll talk about the amazing things I experienced and realized while I was with them.
I realized that I went out of my way for this people because these are the people that helped me when I was down and I love to see them and be able to talk to them personally.
They helped me to get the hell out of my shell. When I am with them, I am not quiet and just a tinee weeny bit shy. It’s like they’re pushing me to give my full potential when socializing.
They are really wonderful people. Go meet a writer and you’d feel like they really understand you to the core ?? And if not, they’ll try to understand you. I can’t explain the feeling, but just the openness of everyone? It’s impeccable!
Here are the bloggers I have met! Visit their blogs and see for yourself how wonderful these people are.
Kuya Jheff – He’s the one who organized the meet up hehe. Probably the kindest person I have met. He’s very patient, honest and nice. I really like him as a person. He inspires me to be better.
Rhea – Met her on the first meet up but I was not able to really socialize with her until the second meet up. She’s this strong amazing woman and she inspires me to be closer to God. 😀
Jas – The ball of energy that she is, is amazing!! She’s the life of the party and there is no dull moment when you are with her.
Jonathan – met this guy on the first meet up but was not able to really know him well, the second time I met him, I realized he’s kind, funny and a great person!
Aysa – I was not able to talk to her that much because I was late and she needs to go home early hehe. But just like how she is in her blog—natural, kind and maganda!
Ely – I was looking forward to meet this person! KAKAIBANG FEELING! I didn’t know that Ely will be going talaga sa meet up and nung nakita ko na siya, NATUWA TALAGA AKO HUHUHU!
Kate – I think I knew Kate from the blog even before I knew these people and I was so excited to see her. FINALLY. She’s this amazing person who helped me in my darkest days. Huhuhu coffee date please!
Sensei – I was not able to talk to her that much because I was seated far from her although I was able to socialize with her before the meet up through comments and blog reading hehe. I like her!
Grace – I met her before at a blogging event but she can’t remember me HAHAHA. She’s this cute woman, very friendly and nice too! Can’t wait to see her again.
James – He’s this cool guy and I think he’s easy to get along with. He’s also very nice!
Patrick – I was not able to talk to him personally because when I arrived he already left but then he came back so we were just talking in groups with him hehe.
Pajama – She’s very mysterious but she has this game lagi vibes.
Overall, it was a nice experience to be able to at least meet the people behind the blogs I read every day. I hope our other TFIOB friends will be able to join us next time! Really looking forward to meeting a lot more people from the blogging community. Kakatuwa!
Pagkatapos kong malugmok, ipinakita sakin ni God na masyado akong naka-focus sa mga nakakapag-pa-stress sakin kaya kinailangan pa niyang ipakita sa akin na kaya kong maging okay.
After writing about my little drama I had, I felt better. Moreover, I felt even better when you guys commented and helped lift my spirits! No matter how simple your messages were, it was enough to make me feel better again. Nakakaiyak yung mga comforting words niyo huhuhuhu 💖💖💖
I keep a copy of the Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff OMNIBUS at my work table. I usually read it every morning but it has been a few days since I last opened it. When I did, what I saw left me surprised and tearful. The title is “Light a Candle Instead of Cursing the Darkness” it says that instead of stressing ourselves out over the problems we face, it’s best to find a solution. The line that caught my attention the most was this “taking positive, solution-oriented steps toward improving a situation instead of complaining about what’s wrong. It means being more a part of the solution rather than a reminder or reinforcement of the problem” (I must remember this)
Another one is this “When we focus too much on what’s wrong, it reminds us of other things we disapprove of or wish were different, which can lead us toward feelings of discouragement and being overwhelmed”
As much as I can, I shall try to remind myself of these techniques or strategies in order to avoid dramas and too much stress.
I was informed today that some of my overtime pay will be credited on this particular cut-off. I didn’t know how to react. I will have my pang-shopping and my sister’s school fee! Muhahahahahahahahah.
Aside from those, I realized that God and the Universe is really trying to make me feel better through small things that go unnoticed. Traffic wasn’t so bad today despite the fact that traffic was 10 million times heavier yesterday in Pasig compared to most days! It was insane. So I sort of expected another grueling battle with the traffic in Pasig. Surprisingly, it was moderate and actually a bit fast moving! My coffee has just the right amount of sugar and creamer. You see, being a batanguena I like my kapeng barako black. But my mom insists on putting creamer and sugar in it para hindi daw masyadong matapang. I don’t like creamy coffees and yesterday, my coffee is way too creamy for my liking. Today, it was just perfect! Another thing is that, payroll has been credited early!! Compared to other companies, our payroll gets credited later than everyone else’s kaya hallelujah talaga sa salary kanina! HAHAHA.
Lastly, siguro hinga lang ng malalim, tapos laban lang ulit!
I don’t think people understood what I was saying or maybe they did tapos ako yung hindi nakaintindi hahahaha. But what I am really trying to say and pointing out is how teka, ayan nafigure out ko na,how people love seeing other people’s lives go viral. How other feel the need to make something viral when they are bashing someone.
Cases in point: Kabit VS Legal Wife, Ex-BF VS Ex-GF retaliating every single detail why they finally broke up. Naniningil VS Nangutang ; Posts usually start off with “Pasikatin natin ito” shaming other people for what they have done.
Ayan shet, nagkakalinaw yung pinoproblema kong hindi ko naman dapat iniisip HAHAHAHA
In line with what I have written yesterday HERE let’s clarify the difference of social relevance, rants and parinigs over social media.
When something is of social relevance like the public must really be involved, something about a crime, a video of people being harassed in traffic, while stuck in traffic or something about a social issue, it’s okay especially if social media is the only way to trace the person you’re trying to pursue.
For instance, I came across a video today that went viral when an elder woman harassed a twenty year old something young lady in a public transportation. In that post, she said that she’s posting it so that she can find that person who harassed her so she can press charges or like at least have her parents talk to that person. So that’s actually something reasonable at least, for me. (or is it not acceptable? Nalilito na ako mamshie)
Then if you rant on your social media or make parinig, I don’t think I get to have a say in it (since I rant so much on twitter) We are all responsible over what we post on social media and if someone calls you out, it’s on you. As for your readers, friends or followers, they can just mute or unfollow, it’s their call.
While writing this, I have contradictions toward my ideas. HALP! What can you say about this issue? Tara let’s discuss! HEHE ❤
Why do I write so often? As in everyday, may posts ako siguro 1 to 3 posts a day? How do I do that? Kahit hindi naman ako sikat na blogger sadyang ang dami ko lang sinasabi lagi HAH!
Hi guys! Here are several reasons why I can write so many posts or how I can write daily (except on weekends)
I don’t have many friends I can talk to on a daily basis. So I end up writing everything that I could have told a real life person. (sad nu hahaha chos)
I think about a lot of random things and I want to share it with other people but I don’t have anyone aside from Kyx and my mama who would listen to all of those random thoughts so I end up writing it here on my blog hehe.
I work as an in-house copywriter. I write a whole lot of contents for newspaper, social media, magazine and all that. No one bothers me in the office, not so much. So when I get burned out, I’ll write something using MS Word and people still think I’m working on an article hahahaha ‘kala niyo ang dami kong time ‘no? HAHAHA! ßeto talaga yung reason kung bakit nakakapagsulat ako ng madalas sa blog eh. Sana hindi mabasa ng officemates ko. If mabasa niyo, guys ginagawa ko naman work ko eh. Sadyang need lang ng break daily diba? LELS. Hahaha
I am very very quiet in real life. Especially in the office. Backstory: it took me a good 6 months before I warmed up to my officemates. They are very friendly and warm, when I was new here, a lot of other people are also new (so hindi ka ma-OP talaga diba) but I am very distant. I don’t talk to them unless I need to or they need something from me, I don’t eat lunch with them, it’s either I wait for all of them to finish eating before I eat or I wait for Kyx’s lunch break (dati same building kami nung nag-ooffice pa si Kyx) Now, I talk to my officemates and I eat lunch with them. I’m also a bit talkative now but really, I’m a quiet and shy type of person MEHEHE. I only ever unleash my mind and soul here on my blog, dito nabubuhos.
I find it hard to speak. I am an awkward person and conversations in real life kinda make me cringe so as best as I could, I communicate with my office mates through chat or emails HAHAAH. So maybe, I write a lot cause this is the only space I have wherein I can talk wholeheartedly? And twitter!!
When you guys, as a couple fight about small or petty things, how do you patch things up?
For us, if it’s only me—making a big deal out of him breathing too loudly or smiling in the wrong manner or just being pissed cause I can *rolling eyes*, Kyx pulls out his funny streak and I’d end up laughing. He has this unique antics prepared for when I turn into a monster or something. One of it is playing a “patama” song while I’m brooding over things that are not even brood-worthy.
One of his favourite songs to play when I’m acting up is a song by Christopher Cross called Is There Something.
When I’m mad, pissed, upset or irritated with him he’d blast this off and I would be all like “what the actual fuck?” then he’ll smile and laugh at me. I’d go laughing and I’d forget why I’m even mad in the first place.
Sobrang gago diba? Pinapatugtog niya yan kapag napipikon na ako sakanya eh di natatawa tuloy ako. WTF hahahaha. Here’s how the chorus goes:
“Is there something that you want to tell me
Is there something that I ought to know
Are we something that’s still worth fighting for
Or should I simply let you go
Is there something I can do to reach you
Are we something more than history
I’ll find some way to convince you to stay
If you just tell me honestly
Is there something left of you and me”
Nagegets niyo ba ginagawa niya? Nakakatawa kasi eh. Nagdadrama. Bigla nalang niya ‘yang papatugtugin kapag nag-aattitude ako so siyempre natatawa nalang ako, nagbabati tuloy kami ng wala sa oras hehehehe. However, he only does this kapag alam niyang kaya niya. Minsan kasi, super monster ako tawag niya doon ay “auto-demon” kaya kapag auto-demon ako, hindi niya yan magagawa. Hahaha.
I added a new menu thingy on my blog, it says “Everyday Reads” and there I (and will) put the links of the blogs I read every day. If you are interested in checking out their blogs, go see the “Everyday Reads” page. I added it because it’s hard for me to keep track of the blogs I read every day, as in I go to the “following” page wherein I get to see the people I follow and then get the URLs and then copy paste it. Hayy. I don’t know any other way to have a link to their page so I made something like this haha. I also need to fix it soon or edit it cause the last time I checked, some links are not clickable. *sigh*
I am also planning to add a category wherein I decipher song lyrics hah!
I want to have my weekend updates back again but I’m still thinking about it. Some weekends are fun but some aren’t. Nonetheless, maybe I’ll write about it anyway. Let’s see.
I wrote a lot of stuff but all are unfinished. I also ran out of scheduled posts now so maybe I’ll work on writing tonight.
What else do I have to say? Oh! Listen to Tired (Kygo Remix) ! I just learned of that song yesterday and I can’t stop singing it since then hah!