Cohabiting “Issue”

There are mixed reactions and opinions toward this matter but I want to know what you guys think and what’s your take in cohabiting?

In the Philippines (my country) cohabiting is popularly known as “living in” together with your partner while outside or before marriage.

It’s pretty interesting how people perceive these things especially in the Philippines. If you guys are in the US or Canada or Europe, you guys would probably think that though family values and whatnot are prioritize, your society is more open to these things than uptight countries like mine.

You see, the catholic church has a lot to say on things like this. There are a lot of issues and arguments (not just about cohabiting: how girls should dress, how men should cut their hair, how the color of the hair should be like this etc etc) but onto a more pressing issue, cohabiting is considered something “wild” and “terrible” for most people but there are families (like mine) who are more open to these things/issues.

My take on cohabiting is this:

As long as you are an adult, have finished school, has a decent job, can pretty much do a whole lot of adulting and is a responsible individual, then cohabiting is not a problem. I mean the church can say whatever (the hell) they want to say, they might even say it’s disrespectful and whatnot but a lot of things are not enclosed to just religion in itself.

Cohabiting, for me, is a step forward to independence. It’s like a “test run” or a “trial” to married life. It’s like going through what marriage looks like and preparing yourself further more to how a lot of things inside a marriage works.

Kyx and I pretty much live in the same roof and trust me, it’s not like we do teenage things. It’s not like we indulge over sex like there’s no tomorrow (TMI). What usually goes on in our lives is none of other people’s business but for the sake of this post, I shall treat you to what we go through on a daily basis.

We start the day by me getting ready for work, then I’d wake him up for breakfast, I drink my apple cider vinegar then eat breakfast with Kyx. He brings me to work then he picks me up after. While I’m gone, he paints and works on digital art (he works as a digital illustrator. You should check his artworks!) then after ny work, we head home and eat dinner with his parents. After dinner, we watch itsjudytime on YouTube then I do yoga for about an hour or a half hour (depends on my mood lol). After that, it’s either I watch Korean drama series or read a book. I fall asleep at around 11pm and Kyx would go on painting. THAT’S THE USUAL ROUTINE and tell me what’s wrong with that?

We share our expenses, balance our lives with laughter and drama just like normal people and we just so happen to cohabit. I don’t find anything wrong with what we’re doing. Our parents support us fully with our decisions and for me, that’s what’s important. As long as our family supports us and as long as we live with our values and principles, as long as we continue to be good people, then cohabiting shouldn’t be an issue.

Cohabiting is not easy. You have to really run your lives like adult adults. Like you both have to freaking adult everyday whether you like it or not. We’re just a bit lucky that we have a maid to help us do household chores. Both of us are working full time and it’s such a struggle to squeeze in chores on a daily basis. However, if the maid is away, we make sure that we clean the dishes, cook decent food (or have food delivered to our home because lol who are we kidding when we’re both tired and want good food but have no energy to do so? So yeah) we have our clothes sent to the laundry, we assign other chores to each other, we help each other a lot!

I’ve read an article filled probability and statistics and all that crap but news flash: at the end of the day, relationships do last when two people make it work. It’s not like it depends on whether you cohabited or not. Also, let people live the way they want and should because if their lives turned out to be unhappy and miserable, they have themselves to blame. I mean come on, people live the way they do for their own reasons and we must not meddle on their decisions.

What’s your take? I’m interested.

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Thea

Thea, 26, INFJ (Turbulent) Always interested in other people's opinion on matters, ideas and random thoughts. I mostly keep to myself but I found that writing in this blog is easier than bottling my feelings up. Reading, writing, tea, coffee and wine are my favorite things. You can catch me mostly on twitter and instagram: @xoxthea make sure to say hello! :")

3 thoughts on “Cohabiting “Issue””

  1. Personally, I’m *super* in favor of cohabiting! Like you said, it’s a good trial run before marriage and a good “next step” in becoming more serious and committing to your relationship. Me and my boyfriend, we’re planning on moving in together either by January 2019 at the latest (because right now we’re both still saving up for tuition fees for our MAs so we need to have as little expenses as possible huhuhu) and we already have budgets drawn up for rent, utilities, groceries, gas, and so forth. For me, it’s not a good idea to get legally entangled with someone (i.e. marrying) without having an idea of how this person spends and budgets money, does and/or delegates chores, what they are behind “closed doors” so to speak. Kudos to you and Kyx for being mature enough to manage living together!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks! Hahaha diba, ang annoying kasi ng ibang tao kung makapagsalita sila feeling nila yung idea and perception of truth nila ay yun nalang ang tama at dapat panigan. Sobrang annoying kapag may bible verses na na-involve. As in ano bang sinasabi nyoooo hahaha sarap magwala hahahaha
      After nyo mag-MA kayang kaya niyo na yan! 🙂 Hindi biro mag-cohabit pero masaya haha 😀

      Liked by 1 person

      1. After enrollment, lilipat na ako. I live in the south kasi pero sa UPD ako magaaral so teh, ang hirap! Anyone isang bagsakan lang ang gastos for tuition fee so after that’s out of the way, manageable na siya! 🙂

        HAHAHA MY GOD THOSE BIBLE VERSES. TEH. Just because *you* want to obey every single last thing in the Bible doesn’t mean other people have to! Jsq nkklk. And anyway, if you’re going to be pedantic about following *everything* sa Bible, why are you wearing clothing blends, eating shellfish, and not sacrificing animals? Gosh kanya kanyang trip lang yan!

        Like

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