After everything, I got lost into my own little world. The world I created trying to shelter myself from too much pain. I created something sturdy for myself, something that will shield me from heartbreak.
I created a new Facebook account and blocked anyone that I don’t want to be part of my new life. I kept mostly to myself in the social media world, just like others, I posted only what’s on the surface. I stopped looking at my instagram feed, afraid that familiar faces might pop and I’ll only get triggered and cry. Allow me to do that for myself because that is how I think would work for me while dealing with the grief and burden.
I resorted to my blog. Wrote my feelings out, interacted a lot only to the people in and around the wordpress world. I stayed out of the zone in real life and only met up with the people that’s really dear to my heart.
I lost track of those who have hurt me and sometimes, I wonder how everything turned out for them but I realized that it’s good to not keep tabs on these people in order for me to fully recover and move on from all these.
Someone asked me if I get bothered by what they say about me. Maybe if I was asked a month or 2 ago, I’d tell you that I’ll be affected. But now, I don’t bother anymore. I also believe that people involved in that drama are over it and wouldn’t talk about me. I believe after all these, they are okay and happy. After all, I was the one left behind right?
So now, I’ll tell you. If you get too bothered about what others think and say, remember that we can only control ourselves. What we think and what we do. We can’t control others just as they can’t control us, so let them be. Let them judge you, say stuff about you, because as far as you know, what they say and do is none of your business just as what you say and do are none of theirs. Because at the end of the day, what they say and do speaks and shows more about them than you. So chill out, get over it, walk past the drama and move on. Though hard at first, you can (fucking) do it!