Oh and By The Way…


This is me being all happy today!

I’m a few days away from turning another year older and ahhhh I just wanna stop growing old but I can’t help but feel nice that it’s almost my birthday!

In a long time, I have dreaded my birthday. I hated summer because I know that it’s not gonna be long before I turn another year older. Like on my old blog entries and about a year ago, I was dreading the days before my birthday because I never wanted to celebrate it. Not because I didn’t wanna grow older but I felt like I am being forced to be responsible, to be someone I am not. I grow anxious because I didn’t think I was ready, I didn’t believe in myself, I didn’t like myself. I’d remember picturing myself as a successful grown-up but the moment I enter that phase, I get too caught up with myself and the strings I have attached to myself, restricting everything I have control over.

But now, a lot has changed!

I am very far from saying “Oh yes, at last! I have figured my life out, I have sorted myself and I am exactly where I planned to be. I love it” no. I am not there. At least not yet. However, I feel like I am more open to possibilities, changes and opportunities. I welcome change more than ever and I have learned a lot about myself over the course of 25 years. Now, as I am almost 26, I look back and cringe at how stupid I was before. How naïve, how angry, how different! I see a great difference from where I was at before, to where I was now—emotionally, mentally and spiritually.

Can’t say I am stable but I’m probably more improved than before! The fact that I understand myself more now in most days than I don’t is pretty impressive huh? I know I have a long way to go, I have more to learn and a bunch of stuff to let go but I am happier and bolder now!

I like myself more therefore, I get to like other people more than I did before. I am in control of my decisions and I trust my instinct more! I also understand the choices I make and I thank myself for being who I am today. I am stronger and more lively!

I guess this is God’s doing, my family’s support and my friends. Aside from that, I guess Yoga helped me a lot too! Whoo!

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Thea

Thea, 26, INFJ (Turbulent) Always interested in other people's opinion on matters, ideas and random thoughts. I mostly keep to myself but I found that writing in this blog is easier than bottling my feelings up. Reading, writing, tea, coffee and wine are my favorite things. You can catch me mostly on twitter and instagram: @xoxthea make sure to say hello! :")

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