When you like someone to be your friend but they ignore you or plainly don’t want anything to do with you, what would you do?
This seems like a preschool or primary school problem but these sort of things happen even as you get older. I am naturally an amicable person. When I was young, I love to make friends no matter how they look, what their race are, no matter what language they speak. I protect my friends from bullies and even try to befriend the bullies because I feel like everyone is really a good person and that no one is supposed to feel left out. I hate feeling out of place, I hate being left out that’s why I want everyone to be happy around each other. But you know, life can’t always be manageable and the world is not always a happy friendly place.
I have experienced being out of place or left out, I experienced wanting people to be my friend but they don’t seem to reciprocate that feeling. When I was a teenager, I felt the need to always belong. I cared so much about belongingness and all that crap which lead me to all my insecurities. I have overcame some and I am still battling a couple more but I guess I am learning. I know that as much as I like to please everyone, I would fail at it because not everyone will like you even if you’ve been nice to them. Not everyone will appreciate your kindness and not everyone will want you as their friend.
When I turned 22 (I think) that’s the time I realized that I have a lot of friends and that I shouldn’t worry about the people who didn’t want to be friends with me. If they don’t want to be my friend, I realized it’s not meant to be. It’s a little harsh to say that “it’s their loss” but maybe that’s really how it should be. I found a lot of other friends who appreciate me and want me for who I am, whom I don’t need to make extra effort just to please them.
Every once in a while, I still get sad and think about what I did wrong to deserve this, what’s possibly wrong with me but I came to the realization that these people are not meant to be in my life if they treat me like crap. If they don’t want to be in my life, then that’s fine. I shall accept the fact that not everyone is meant to be part of some people’s life.
Then all the other clichés must come to the picture, if people are meant to be, then they would meet and be part of each other’s lives. If not, then you just gotta let it go.
There are people whom we want to be part of our lives but they simply do not want to be part of ours. If that’s the case and the likeness is not reciprocated, it is then time to move on. Just like how lovers go or end relationships right? The bright side is that there are other people who see your value, who want to be in your life, who wishes for you to stay in their lives for as long as eternity, who appreciate your soul and existence.
I think people whom you want to be your friend but they don’t want to be your friend is good to exist. This makes you appreciate the people who appreciate you no matter what. The people who doesn’t like to be your friend exists so that you can love those who want to be your friend, so you can love yourself more. They teach you life lessons you don’t even notice. Instead of questioning your value as a person, appreciate yourself more.